some exciting news {and a big thank you}

Thursday, February 25, 2010

Wow. Thank you all for your comments on my last post. I cannot believe how many of you are at a crossroads, trying to figure out what to do next. Your words of encouragement & support mean more to me than you can possibly imagine. I want to thank each and every one of you from the bottom of my heart. It is so hard to convey how much love I feel for all of you, but I do.

If I can inspire just one person to take a leap of faith and follow their heart, that would be incredible. Some of you used words like strong, brave, and proud. Well let me tell you something. I am no stronger than you. A year ago, I wouldn't have gotten on a plane and today I am living in Chicago. It took me such a long time to get where I am today. I have struggled so much the past few years and have gone through periods where I have been downright miserable.

I am just going to put it out there and share what is going on. I do not have plans to leave Chicago. I was going to wait and share the exciting news with you once it was official, but last night I met up with a girl that is looking for a roommate. She's adorable, sweet, and I really liked her. Assuming things work out the way we discussed, I will be moving in to her place next week and signing a 6 month lease. So for those of you who were wondering if I planned to stay, the answer is yes. Definitely.

I am such an insecure person. That is something that I really struggle with. I am sitting here wondering if she will realize that she doesn't want me to move in. She invited me to come out with her and her friends Saturday night and told me I could start moving in my things whenever I'm ready. I still need to work on a little thing called confidence. Nothing is signed, and this feels too good to be true. In my life when things have felt that way, they have been. It's almost as if I feel that I do not deserve this, and that is crazy.

I wrote this when I turned 26, and this when I turned 27. For years {literally} I sat in my room at my mom's house convinced that this was it for me. I thought I needed to get married and have babies to be happy. I am so glad that things didn't turn out how I thought I wanted them to turn out. I am so glad that I am not married with children {not that there is anything wrong with that}. In my early 20s, I thought I had to be married by 28 and that I had to be a mom by 30. I'd like to have kids in my 30s, but I am not counting down the days, and I am not worried about it anymore. At 27, things changed. I changed.

This experience has been amazing. Unreal, scary, wonderful, perfect and amazing. I have had to step outside the box in every way possible. There have been quite a few lonely days and nights, and I imagine there will be a few more. Remember, I work from home, so I really have to make an effort to get out there and meet people.

The blog world has been an amazing resource when it comes to making friends. I met one blogger who invited me to an event where I met three great girls. I have plans with two of them over the next few days. Today, this blogger tweeted to me and asked if I'd like to get together. I {of course} said yes! Turns out, we may be seeing Oprah together this week! I got an email from the Oprah show about my last minute tickets, so I really hope we get to go!

I feel like there is still so much I want to say. So much I need to say. But it is late, this post is long enough, and I should really get off the computer.

I {of course} have one more thing to say.

If you left a comment and feel like you want to talk to me about this experience or if you have any questions for me, please email me or leave a comment. I will be happy to answer any questions you may have.

Ok. One more, but that's it. I promise.

I wrote this when my good friend Jill moved from Houston to San Antonio: I know people move all the time, but I think it takes a really brave person to just pick up and move new city.

So that brings me to one final point. Why do we see the good in others but not in ourselves? I picked up and moved from LA to Chicago! A year ago, I wouldn't have boarded a plane. I need to give myself some credit, and chances are, you need to do the same.

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22 comments

  1. How true, I've seen the good in you as I've worked with you over the past 18 months. I'm so glad you are doing this. Life doesn't always work out the way we hope or plan. But sometimes we are the key to our own happiness and making it happen for ourselves. 6 months in Chicago? I'm hoping i can find an excuse to come to the BlogHer conference, even though I'm in Australia and all. Maybe I can swing by? xx

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  2. Danielle, I'm so proud of you!! It does take alot of courage to do what you're doing!!

    Let me share a little something with you. Around 1991, my sister decided to move to Hawaii. She had a couple of connections, but just like you, nothing solid. She went through a few roommates and a couple of jobs, but she is still there. She met her husband there, and now they have three boys.

    You never know what is in store for you in Chicago, but you are there for a reason. Enjoy it and take as much as you can in! This is such a wonderful experience for you. This will only strengthen you!!!

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  3. It is so encouraging to read your words. I am 25 and I know exactly how you feel. I am very single at the moment and have often gotten really bogged down about not being married in a relationship. I really try to work on my self-esteem and just being content with the here and now. I truly believe that the 20s are the toughest time for young women! Too bad I don't live in Chicago and we could get together...you are amazing!

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  4. yes, give yourself some credit! you've done a huge thing! and all i can say about oprah is...OMG!!! i'll be so jealous!!

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  5. Wow! I just read this post and the one before and it seems you have been in a whirlwind! I am glad things are settling down for you and your life is getting on track. It is so hard to move to a new place. We moved one hour away and it was like we had to start our whole life over so I cant imagine making the move you did!

    Have you checked out meetup.com ? I joined a few groups and met some fun people a number of years ago and in a city like Chicago I am sure there are hundreds of groups and events!

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  6. Your blog is so fun to read (maybe because it's just REAL)!

    I'm so glad I ran across your design stuff a few months ago - I've gotten tons of compliments on your work and have sent your info on to other girls - THANK YOU!

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  7. Good for you. And Chicago is lucky to have you

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  8. Yay for you & your new found friend/apartment! I hope everything turnes out perfect & you two have a great time this weekend :)

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  9. It takes time to figure out who we are. As women, we don't really begin to come into our own until we get to our mid-twenties. (Dude, men take so much longer. lol) Your words sound like what I could have written years ago. I LOVED turning 30. We had a party. I LOVED turning 35. The older I get, the more "me" I feel and the less apologetic I feel about being me. Bring on 40! Bring on 50! If I feel this good about being in my own skin, I look forward to aging. You're finding your way. Feels great, doesn't it?

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  10. Great news on finding a roommate! You're not alone in feeling insecure about stuff like that...I'm the same way. Enjoy this time of exploring a new city and learnng about yourself and meeting new people! You've done such a great thing!

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  11. Yes! You really do need to give yourself some credit. :)


    ***

    Well, I'm 18 (yes - I understand that everyone in the blog world/on twitter tells me "how young" I am, etc. when they find that out)...but...while I am not at all saying that I'm not young - for whatever reason, I feel that I am not doing enough to really get my future 'going.' (maybe the word for that really is that I am insecure). But I don't feel at all that I'm insecure (does that make sense?)

    That is really the big step that I am trying to make: to just stop holding back - to take some chances - because, right now, my life is kinda stuck on "auto-pilot" in a way...I'm with the same people everyday, I do the same things everyday practically. I need to vary things up - but I just can't bring myself to step-out of my comfort zone. I'll admit it: that has been something that's been hard for me ever since I was a toddler! LOL

    So, Danielle - you did it... so, maybe I can too? :)

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  12. Ditto what Jen the Blog Mom said.

    I'm about 10 yrs older than you and sometimes we, the 30-somethings, feel like it's our mission to tell you 20-somethings what we wished we'd known then.

    When we first "met" and started getting to know each other, I just wanted to shake you when you were putting the timelines on yourself about when to get married and when to have children. Hey full disclosure here. LOL! I just wanted to tell you that there's a whole big world out here for you to experience so don't be in such a rush.

    It sounds like you finally got it. Yay for you!! I'm so happy for all these new adventures you have in store for you in Chicago.

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  13. So excited to hear about the roommate! It's so wonderful that you've put yourself out there and experienced these new situations...so happy for you!

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  14. Oh, I'm so behind... sorry! I have to read the post before this, but I am stoked you are staying in Chicago. When I saw you in Chicago a week ago, I could tell it was where you were meant to be for a while. I haven't "heard" the happiness in your voice in a long time, and it was great to see and hear it.

    I really am proud of you no matter how cheesy that sounds. Enjoy this time; you never get it back. Do what you can while you can so you can be YOU!

    Love ya!

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  15. I'm reading all of these posts backwards because I am behind, but I wanted to let you know that going back through your posts, I have found you to be so much "lighter" these days. You are more whimsical, more happy and jubilant, and more fun to read, if that was even possible. Chicago has done wonders for you.

    Stick with your happiness and joy!

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  16. You are on the right track. Don't look back, just keep moving forward. What a fun time you're going to have!

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  17. Just stumbled upon your blog and I am so inspired by you! It takes a LOT to do what you did- kudos to you!

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  18. This is a great post. It is so easy for us to praise other people and then we are so hard on ourselves or don't want to give ourselves credit when we should. Go you! I'm excited and inspired by your leap of faith! Thank you for being so honest with your feelings...that my dear takes confidence in itself!

    Keep on chasing that dream, I know you will do big things! Next time we come to Chicago to visit my future BIL we are def meeting up! You don't have a choice, ha! ;)

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  19. you are amazing! seriously! i can't imagine picking up and moving, all by myself. you are a very brave girl, and i'm so glad that everything is falling in to place for you!

    life is rough sometimes. i'm going through some confusing stuff right now, and it's nice to know that i'm not alone. our situations are very different, but still the same in certain ways.

    thanks for sharing everything :)

    oh, and i really hope you get to see oprah!! totally jealous about that!!

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  20. Glad you found a roommate, that has to be a nice relief!
    Chicago is a wonderfully fun place to live! There is so much to do and many many great places to eat! Just wait until Summer - Summer in Chicago is SO much fun!!

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  21. I am so glad you are here to stay! Wow you've come so far, good for you! The confidence will come and I feel like the more we focus on wanting confidence, the more we micro manage when we are and aren't confident. Know what I mean? Looking forward to getting together next week, I hope you have a wonderful weekend!!

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  22. Danielle, I don't know you but can I suggest a new book for you to read dealing with feelings of insecurity? it is called So Long Insecurity (you've been a bad friend to us) by Beth Moore. I hear it is just fabulous!

    Best wishes with your move!
    Blessings to you!

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